Many will recall Facts of Life star Lisa Whelchel from the truly popular hit show of the 80s. They might have even watched the cast reunion show, but lesser known to many is the fact that she is a Christian author with many publications to her credit. I was asked to review Friendship For Grownups: What I Missed and Learned Along The Way and was pleasantly surprised by the writing and the author herself . Whelchel speaks candidly of being a child star, moving from her native Texas at the age of 12 to Hollywood where she grew up fast and went on to superstardom as Blair in The Facts of Life. Her first appearance on The New Mickey Mouse Club launched her early childhood career, a career that actually began as an outlet for an overly shy bookish, introverted, child. Not so surprisingly Whelchel missed some key developmental stages in her life as a result of diving headlong into acting so early. This she examines in a calm and matter of fact way to indicate why she headed down this path that led her to write this book. It is a tone that remains constant throughout the book, never maudlin or self-pitying, just a simple fact of her life. This is an admirable quality. When Whelchel was young, she moved to Hollywood and life was essentially suspended while she acted. When The Facts of Life ended, Whelchel’s career came to a halt. Years later, as a homeschooling mother and a pastor’s wife, she realized she had few true friends as a grownup, a glossy superficial veneer preventing her from attaching too deeply to anyone. This book is a really insightful look at the process of working through that veneer allowing vulnerability and growth into your life. Whelchel smartly touches on several key issues with women’s friendships that often prevent women from being genuine in friendships. This is an enjoyable and telling portrait of life in Hollywood from a young age and how Whelchel grew up, learning from her mistakes. There are some truly delicious bits here that all women will relate to, including the gossipy nature of women’s friendships that keep us from working in a truly supportive and collaborative way with each other. She notes her longtime friendship with Nancy McKeon, who played Joe on the hit show, as one of her greatest takeaways from her time acting. She also delves into some of the darker sides of fame that she personally experienced. For instance at an age when puberty began to make the child star gain weight, she was forced daily to endure the humiliation of a weigh in prior to each day of shooting. Others might call that abuse, but Whelchel simply refers to it as something she felt at the time that she deserved. With therapy and the help of friends, she comes to realize how all of these prior experiences led her to create a wall around her that prevented her from being in a true friendship. Friendship For Grownups is a nice read and a smart look at vulnerabilities in female friendships.

Friendship For Grownups, Lisa Whelchel
Thomas Nelson publsihers, 2010, USA, $21.99 US.
Thriftymommas rating $$$$ out of a possible $$$$$$ or 4 out of 5.
Insightful and heartfelt.

Thriftymommastips does not get paid to review books, but receives a free copy of the book from the publisher.

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